It is all about choices, I know

So when faced with this new dilemma in my life called Elrich's baby brother, it was time for introspection again. When I got over the fact that I was the one that wanted another kid, and now Phil is going to have another one - what did I say about my perception that he is living our/my dreams? Incidentally, he never bought that property (but I am getting sidetracked here)

How to approach this? What do I want? Are we going to be awkward about this for the rest of our lives, how will we (Elrich and me and Phil and Thersia, because face it, she is part of this family now as well) deal with this baby brother?

Oi

Then the opportunity was created, in no other place than the local Medical clinic. Where I spend all of Thursday with the doctors, trying to figure out exactly what was brewing in my brain. As I emerged from the physio therapist, I got a weak little hello from just behind my left shoulder. And who was sitting there sheepishly? None other than Phil. Yes, he was sick as well, similar symptoms as me, but not quite as severe and not as whacky, except that he had a rash to add to his ailments (getting side tracked again…maybe my brain did get infected?) so we exchanged a couple of words and I went down to the pharmacy to pick up my script and there we talked some more. So much so that I suggested we sit down for a cup of coffee at a local restaurant.

We talked about this, and that, some business and so on. And right at the end I told him that I want him to know that I have thought about this baby and him and Thersia and I have decided that they are all welcome in my house. That we will just be an extended family, that I want E to grow up with his brother, that we must be comfortable going to the kiddies birthday parties and that I know they are not a match made in heaven. But that I wish them happiness in any case and whether they are together as a couple going forward or not, his kid(s) will still be welcome in my house. And that I want us to create as normal and loving environment as possible for all the children involved. He agreed with me, which is not surprising as he has always agreed with me ;-) but he did make one additional gesture, he invited me to Thersia’s birthday party the 20^th of December at his house, which will double as a Christmas party for the family and family friends and all the children. So I accepted. And then today when they came to fetch E, they dropped a poster counting down the days to the birth of the little tyke – due date 16^th of April. I will mount it in E’s room and dutifully stick stickers on it.

For the life of me, I cannot remember the little guy’s name, but it does sound something like Dolphin but spelled along the lines of Dhaol Finn (really not sure about the spelling as Phil did it over the phone and by that stage I was trying to not burst out laughing)

It is confirmed

E is going to become a big brother. The new baby boy will be born in April.

I am still giggling about this. I cannot help but remember the sessions we had in marriage councelling where Phil very clearly stated that he just does not feel like the commitments of fatherhood and why should he sacrifice his immediate carnal desires to be a loving and supportive husband? How could his wife expect that of him?

I have it on good authority that nothing has changed. That he still runs away from wife and house on a regular basis. That he has told the girlfriend that he just needs to get away from her and everything a bit every now and again. To hang out with his mates at odd places and do things he never talks to anyone about. I am so glad/relieved/ elated that I am not part of that crazy ride. I do feel sorry for the girlfriend though.

I wonder how E will react to the news, when his father plucks up the courage to tell him. He has to do it and soon, I am sure reference will be made more and more often to the new baby... and besides, the girl is very obviously pregnant.